The Shack

I recently read a book called, yep you guessed it, "The Shack". I have struggled through so many issues in my life and this book has helped me to take a look at my life experiences and embrace them. For those who know me this might sound a little strange because my journey so far has not always been smooth. Granted some of the bumps were self-induced however "The Shack" has begun to show me how to forgive myself for those bumps. It is also leading me in the direction for Forgiveness in many other areas of my life.

I am so excited about this journey and will share as I go. I plan on reading the book again because I know I missed some important stuff the first time around.

Please keep in mind that this book cannot and will not substitute for the Bible but it helps me to Embrace GODS word instead of fearing it.

It's really hard to explain but if you get the chance read this book.

Life is a wonderful experience, even the bad stuff.

Love Ya.

Some of the Reason

Just look at these faces. They are one of the many reasons that I do what I do. I Love them so much! The picture of the three are my youngest daughter's children. Morgan, Mea and Mason. The little dude with the glasses (which are mine) is Andrew. They are amazing and are giving me a second chance to be more of a "Perfect" MeMa. Since as you already know by my title I am the Not So Perfect Mom. Luckily my kids love me anyway.

Family You Gotta Love Them

Okay, so here is the deal.

I get on-line this morning and was very excited to see that I had received an e-mail from my brother. I had been trying to get in touch with him all week and thought maybe he was just touching base. Couldn't have been more wrong.

Here is what he wrote...

Good evening,
I love you all dearly and understand you have differing opinions about my
personal choices and my personal life.
I say this to the three of you, and Clara (if I had her email), I am your
brother, and your blood. You may not approve of what I am doing with my life,
but I am happy. You only know what you believe, and that belief is skewed unless
you spend the time to talk to me and find out where I am in my life. Until you
reach that point and are truly interested in how I am, as your brother, and your
blood relative, you will never know.
These are the hardest words I have ever had to send to any of you. Until you can
accept me, for me, and love me for who I am, leave me alone. If your loyalties
are, in my opinion misplaced, then so be it.
My life has changed. My goals and efforts in life are centered around My kids,
my new family, and my Church. If you took the time to be genuine with me, you
would know and understand that. I know for certain Mom would. She always did.
She never judged me, as you have. Mom always understood me as me. If you can't,
then what's the use of us continuing to pretend.
You may not like what I write, but it is what it is, and in my opinion, long
over due.
Don't form your opinions on what you DON'T know. There are many sides to every
story. If I have done wrong, God will settle the score in the end.
Don't bother to respond unless you are willing to respect my choices.
I love you dearly, but must say, I am disappointed in your loyalties to this
point.
Your brother,
Chuck

Okay, now what am I supose to make of this?

I have to say I was very hurt. I have been supportive of my brother to the end.

He said later that I wasn't actually included in the e-mail. Isn't that funny since my name was included.

I Love Him, I truly do.

I just don't get it.